It is Autumn here in New Zealand. It's beautiful.
We recently went for a little jaunt out West to Mt. Cook, then Queenstown, and then to Milford Sound to see the changing leaves and mountains and fiordland. Much of our time was spent in the car driving, but we were just one of many who would pop out at the side of the road to take some pictures.... This first one is a view of Mt. Cook from the road. I love the blue sky contrasting with the beautiful Autumn leaves. The sky got pretty cloudy at times, and we also got a lot of great shots in the rain and fog (equally beautiful, I think).
The second picture here kinda shows that a bit... cloudy, with the sun showing through a hole in the sky. It made it a bit mysterious, and when we went down to the Fiorlands it really got wet and foggy and spooky but beautiful....
It is kinda a reminder that beauty comes in many different forms. And also that sometimes the changes we see are beautiful in part because they are changes.
As I've gotten older, I've become a bigger fan of Autumn. I used to be more of a "Summer Girl"; loving the sun and the water and all that Summer is. I still like Summer, but I think that I am more appreciative of Autumn now. It used to not be so appealing because it represented slowing down and dying to me, but I think that now that I am older and slowing down myself I appreciate it more. There is a lot of beauty in change.
So here I am in New Zealand, and I am trying to appreciate all the changes I see and feel. Life goes in cycles, like the seasons and the cycles of the moon, and I am in the Autumn of my life. Sure, it is possible that I will live more than another 40 years, but I am also well aware that I could die any moment really. And no matter how long I continue to live, my body is slowing down and "changing colors". I am trying to appreciate that. I think that I am mostly succeeding.
For my children, it is still Spring, and I am glad for that too. They are both blossoming, and it is beautiful to see. I am very thankful for the opportunities this trip has given us, and I am glad that we have done it together.
Often I wish we had others to share it with, but I try not to dwell on what I don't have, and instead appreciate what I do have. I wrote about my family in a previous post, and I am very appreciative of it. Although I did choose to have a family, I couldn't choose the people they've turned out to be and when I look at them I realize that I am very lucky. We aren't without our faults and sometimes the colors aren't so "pretty", but really the beauty is in the imperfections and the love that is there. We may not be a lot of people, but there is a lot of love here.
We are returning to Indiana in just about a month. It will be strange to go back ... while in many ways not much on the surface has changed - after all it has only been 4 months - in other ways everything has changed. It is impossible for me to be here and not feel profoundly transformed. It has been a profoundly spiritual journey for me, and I am curious to see what happens when I return to the US.
There is a New Zealand advertising campaign: Get Your Life Back. I definitely needed it, and I think that I've definitely gotten it. The challenge will be keeping it once I'm back in Indiana, but as I keep saying, I plan to take it with me. There is a lot of symbolism about New Zealand that I didn't even realize - things that I have always loved that are symbolic of this country. I first said I wanted to come here for sabbatical over 7 years ago, but I really didn't have any concrete reasons why.... I believe this country has been calling for me for quite some time.
My soul is at peace here and I will always be thankful for this time.
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Truly beautiful, Jen.
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