On Broken Dreams

Ok, so this maybe isn't the most positive post, but I will try to bring it around...

I try to be positive and find the good in everything, but I have really been struggling with some broken dreams. Sometimes I am too busy and distracted by a full life to think about them much, but other times the ache still hits me hard. Sometimes I almost laugh at my previous naivete, but other times I want to curl up and cry... because there are things that I really believed in and thought would happen that just....didn't.

I think most people have suffered from broken dreams. I doubt that there are many people who don't feel some angst and pain from the hopes and dreams that haven't come true. I try not to dwell on the pain, but I still feel like it is important to notice it, and even to honor (in my mind) the dreams that have broken. Because they were a part of me, and they helped to shape who I am now.

I believe that some of my broken dreams can still be fixed and come true in some ways. But others have completely missed their opportunity and it is simply too late. I guess that is what happens as we age... when we are young nearly anything seems possible, but as we get older we realize that time is running out and we need to narrow down our priorities. It doesn't mean that things aren't possible, but it just seems maybe we (or just I?) get more realistic and more selective about what we put our limited energy into.

I wish that I had more time and energy to do all the things I've wanted to do. But there really is only one of me, and unfortunately all the things that I have dreamed about would take more than one of me... that is reality. I think it is a product of growing up that helps us to recognize that, and as much as I'd like to hang on to my childish fantasies, I have been forced to grow up quite a bit over the last few years.... and really, I guess that is good.

But I still feel the ache sometimes, and I think that is good too. Because the dreams were real and beautiful, and I do honor them by remembering and feeling that. And then I honor reality by re-engaging and doing what needs to get done.