I don't share a lot about my husband. He's a pretty private person and avoids social media, so I try to keep him mostly out of my more public thoughts. Even though I am not a "public person" (very few people read my writing or know who I am), I still want to respect my husband's privacy even to those who might actually see this.
But today I want to share a little bit about my husband; B. Today is my Anniversary; both of my wedding day, and of the night we started dating. We met in the Fall of my Freshman year of college, but we started a romantic relationship after re-meeting at a New Year's Eve party five years later. So naturally, it made sense to make it a New Year's Eve wedding. Not only did that make it a great night for a party, but it also made it a great time to have a honeymoon in a nice warm place (we went to Jamaica), and a great excuse to go to other warm places for Anniversaries. Bonus that we would always remember what day we got married (though we sometimes struggle with the year). This year we managed to make it to 27 years. 🎉🎉
Twenty-seven years is a long time. We have now both been married more than half our lives. Pretty wild.
I want people to know that the reason we have managed to stay married so long is because my husband is an amazing man. He is good and kind and smart, and incredibly emotionally strong. And he has saved my life more than once.
When we "re-met" at that New Year's Eve party, I was a mess. I had graduated from college, but was working a job that didn't require a degree. I was an emotional mess from years of unresolved trauma and didn't feel at all worthy of his - or anyone's - love. He had just gotten out of a long-term relationship and I was just supposed to be a fun rebound. And we did have fun.
But we also became good friends, and the rebound kept going. Like any good 90's relationship; we made each other mixed tapes, and we fell in love. If you were to ask me why I love my husband, one of the number one things is that he has great taste in music. I'm serious. My favorite thing to do with him still is to go to concerts (even if they are now virtual, during the pandemic). Almost as enjoyable is listening to his playlists while he is working in his home office across the hall from mine. For me, music is like politics; I would have a really hard time being in a relationship with someone with strongly opposing ideas of either of them. Luckily my husband and I get along with both. We aren't exactly the same, but fortunately we are very compatible.
A lot can happen in 27 years, and we absolutely have had our ups and downs. I haven't always appreciated that he helped save my life, and I still had a lot of work to do on my own. We both also have the tendency to be workaholics and that can make both of us feel neglected. But somehow, we have managed to stay together.
When I was younger I honestly didn't think I would ever get married. My parents had a terrible relationship and I didn't think marriage was a good idea. I didn't know how to disagree in a relationship and not break up, so I went through a long series of short relationships. Until B. He didn't let me break up with him, and he didn't give up on me. And it turns out, he was just what I needed.
So here we are, celebrating another year of marriage. And I realize how incredibly lucky I am. He saved my life again this year.
And he still has good taste in music.
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